I am sitting on my couch. The one that faces the windows that look out to sea. The sky is grey and the clouds reach the horizon. Below- a dark blue water. A speck of white is silhouetted against the coldness of the elements. A boat, far in the distance. Almost to far to see. I look out at it. It looks back at me. Change is coming. Soon there won’t be any boats to look at. Soon there will be soil to sink fingers into.

I am excited by the change. I am also scarred. Scarred I won’t live up to my dreams of having the space I want. It overwhelms me. I look up from the computer. The boat is gone behind a peace lily leaf that reaches to the light of the window. If I move I can see the sail. Even further now.

Now if I move I don’t see it at all.

The sun just broke through the clouds and the sea is now a myriad of colors.